My penis is the apex of life and all other references. Lookin for a cheap vagina at this point. And cheap Korean BBQ
let's just say, the carpet matched the drapes. in colour and length.
But never have I ever had sex with a dirty talker before, so it was something else, to say the least. I signed up to get laid, not play Penthouse Mad Libs.
just got cropdusted by the delivery guy...this was not in my job description.
I mean, he's dancing back and forth between pathetically sad and massively fucking creepy.
just cut a line with my blood donor card...i feel like it will help remind me that i was once a productive member of society.
I just typed my entire senior project presentation on my blackberry,
you woulda been proud of me tonight though. i only made out with 2 guys. and in my defense one of them was to get a job after graduation.
just to let you know, its not cheating if i cant feel my hands.
Were taking his cast off tonite. Need a saw and a gameplan. Meet us at rosies in 30.
I waited so long to accept his friend request that he canceled it. So I added him and when he accepted I deleted him. I wonder how long this will be funny to me
There is no sno cone on earth better than alone naked time. Side note: text when you all are headed home.
Hah I guess I sent that to like ten people, along with another one of me sitting in a bath tub eating an ice cream sandwich.
too bad I'd hit a car before I'd hit a bush.
Are we talking about jumping from windows or your willingness to fuck a car instead of a woman?
my favorite sex position is the one where no sex actually happens we just get really stoned and eat a lot and watch netflix in the dark
Randomize
