Did yall have sex?
Well we both woke up naked and there was a condom wrapper on the floor, but I don't remember so does that count?
Def not... that's how I managed to keep my number under 10 for all of college- If you don't remember, it didn't happen
they just tried to tell me they weren't big into drugs. A) it was the 70's. B) I've seen the pictures.
She just took the bottle of jager to the bathroom and locked the door. Now I hear the water running..if the house floods she's paying for it
so not only am i rooming with two chicks on the volleyball team, but we just put down the deposit on a hot tub. this is going to be the best summer ever for my dick.
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He only talks to me during the summer and it's probably because I let him fuck me in my pool last year.
Babysitting for someone you accidently sent nudies to is so fucking awkward.
Oh my fucking god I saw the pictures. What the mother fucking fuck. Destroy the pictures. Destroy the fucking pictures.
Please confirm the destruction of the pictures. NOW.
You would be too ashamed to ever love me again if you saw the filth I just created. It brings unspeakable dishonor to the nacho dynasty. Like I raped the king's daughter, cut off her hands and made him eat them that's how hard I fucked up nachos.
I'm so tired of waking up with my bed full of deli meats.
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You made a glowstick headband with a helium balloon tied around it and climbed a tree in high heels. I was impressed.
She thinks Jesus was an astronaut.
I sleep texted my mom and asked her for a condom last night
In honor of today being Sunday I am day drinking and watching Grey's Anatomy all day. ALL DAY.
Please keep in mind you are asking relationship advice from a girl who fucked a guy just because we have the same name. Just keep that in mind.
Best case scenario I do a bunch of dirty things to you, blow your mind and you enjoy it. Worst case I stare at you, poke at you, smile and droll on myself, you laugh.
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