I just passed one of the bars and saw my mom kissing another woman. This can't be good....right?
Knowing your life, probably not.
then for some reason i googled "how much to buy a cannon"
she told me her fantasy was her as a 55 year old cook at a truck stop who smokes a pack a day, and I was the 21 year old illegal immigarnt prep cook.
Can we have fireworks this year or will the ocean explode?
I think I get why guys like boobs so much. I just motorboated myself and it's fun. My boobs feel soft and squishy on my face.
It smells like ranch
Must be all the white people
I'm still in shock that he came by my house for five minutes dropped off a Teddy bear and went to the strip club on valentines day
Post-sex chicken soup was such a good idea. It's been like an hour and I'm still applauding myself
Had to go to the urgent for a physical and I gave them my fake. Nurse was a sport though
we should look into getting a golf cart for the weekend. i have a feeling legs wont be a sufficient source of transportation.
For sure. Gotta go. Building an igloo.
He wanted me to blow him while he did curls and looked at himself in the mirror. Not sure if gay or ego maniac.
Momentum is force x velocity. So therefore velocity is 0 - hammered, and force is ur legs locked up and ur face hits the ground.
I felt paralized they just wouldnt move. We need segways when were drunk cuz if we start to fall forward they well take off and save the fall.
It's only just- an eye for an eye, a tooth for a tooth, a nude for a nude
I knew the bike rally would be fun when I saw "male pole dancing" on the schedule
Randomize
