His dick was so small it sat perched on top of his balls like it was king of his scrotum.
she asked me if i wanted her to take her wedding ring off while she was giving me a handjob.
Dude, dont worry about the lamb fetus in the fridge.
What?
Just dont open the beer drawer.
You unbuttoned your shirt and started walking down the center of the road screaming traffic stops for Enrique Iglesias.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
yeah i didn't know anyone, but i just walked in with a lit sparkler and wearing a budweiser shirt and someone handed me a beer.
I just pulled a piece of cookie out of my bra in the middle of class. I'm forever alone.
Im having a st. Get way fucked till i speak Irish pre game party. Bring a compass cause we are about to get lost
Something bad happened. I'm just giving you some notice. So you can smoke some pot and hide all sharp items in the house.
I mean, with your nipple problem im surprised. #hangacoatonem
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My throw up tasted like pumpkin, fall is right around the corner.
Guess who has two thumbs and broke her boyfriends dick?
I'm having leftover pizza for breakfast. I'm clearly not the greatest at this adult thing.
Just ate 2 pieces of pizza in the shower.. New low or fuckin brilliant??
HE IS. YOU SHOULD TOUCH HIS BACK.
IT IS A COURTSHIP RITUAL.
THE MUTUAL BUTT TOUCH IS SACRED.
he'll eat me out, but god forbid we double dip when sharing salsa
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