ohhh my god. this party should be titled "my hookups of summers past" be expecting some good stories tomorrow
can you buy anything in the cafeteria for less than $2? I spent the last of my laundry money on a chia pet
This hotel is not contributing to my sobriety, they have 4 kinds of free wine and beer.
I have no idea what happened after 2 AM. I woke up on my bike, in my bed, with a deep thigh bruise.
I just found our entire wall-to-wall from September 2006 printed out and clipped... it's 49 pages. Blackout me is so considerate of bored-at-work me
I am literally sitting on the toilet in utter disbelieve that last night even happened. My god that was only Monday.
God fucking bless the man who invented the vibrator. Bless him and all his descendants. I think I saw the face of God tonight
I think we might have a drinking problem when the ASU kids called us crazy
No one made them take a shot with us at the 12 hour mark. That's their bad
I lost my bra, he lost his virginity. Seems like a fair trade off.
I know I say this every year but 2015 will be the year I finally have sex with David's sister
Dude. I keep thinking about how I let a man gum my vagina.
I'm sitting on the couch playing the sims, how's ur night going?
I'm sitting on my floor, drinking wine, and listening to bette midlers "wind beneath my wings"
Why are our lives so predictable?
Drunk and bowling. Only good things can come of this
Hey do you care to explain why there are 3 empty pickle jars next to me when I woke up or do I even wanna know?
outside on the street drinkin, walked into a random house and asked to pee, some kid hands me a beer and says i have to chug it first
Randomize
