She has her iPod in her ears slippers and sweats on and is walking around the house up and down the stairs getting "exercise" she just stopped for a water break
This lady in my dui class just asked what patron was. I feel like she doesn't belong here
You know there's only so much I can do with a great personality.
she's a gynecology student. i don't know if my dick's ready for that kind of pressure.
And it looks like I sent you 4 failed attempts at the word "hey." Sorry about that.
I have 20 seconds to get my life together and look presentable.
Boy did I ever crash and burn on the pickled egg pick up line.
You were visibly distraught that my boyfriend and I didn't have sex in your bed. You forced us to take your condoms.
When Pony by ginuwine plays I pretty much just grind on the nearest penis.
The fact that you think I have a life is so flattering to me.
Not sure. He doesn't know where New York is on a map but he gives an incredible spanking.
Who cares about New York?
Is using cherry lube as jam shameful or hilarious
I think one of your friend's offered my friend chicken tenders back at his place...just FYI he should probably come up w/ another line
I tried sex in a car once. It was like trying to do yoga in a drainage pipe with your arms and legs tied while using a typewriter with your penis.
From now on he's gonna have to shave first. It feels like I got eaten out by a chainsaw!
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