Anal astronaut?
Wow word travels fast.
is it trashy that while he was throwing up in the bathroom, i was hooking up with his childhood best friend?
We were in the backseat and he was giggling uncontrolably. It felt like I was giving head to a 10 year old girl.
as they left, you opened the door, dropped your pants then yelled "don't leave, this is what you're missing"
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The vagina on Hilton Head is mighty fine this time of year.
I was trying to sing daddy wasnt there from austin powers but apparently I was crying and and yelling jibberish...I get to into this shit
Rachel and his cat watched us 69 last night. I pretended to be embarrassed the next day... But to be honest I like an audience
He also informed us that it's rude to shove your tit in someone's mouth. Happy Monday.
Meeting his dad and brother for the first time at the jail while I'm bailing him out ISN'T exactly how I pictured this relationship going....
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If you hear a sad honk in the wind it is me.
So after I fell off 4 times we concluded I'm not allowed to ride him anymore.
I have no idea why my husband is mad that I came home at 4 am & all I want to do is eat spaghettios. It's not fucking spaghettios fault.
I lost my bra, he lost his virginity. Seems like a fair trade off.
Pray for me. I just had a sex dream about Debbie Wasserman-Schultz.
just so you know. the medical term for period cramps is mettelschmerz.
glad to know something that causes such misery in my life has such a laughable name.
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