By the way, your roommate is right. His penis is much bigger than yours.
Just watched a UNI fan at the bar lick the tears off of a KU fans face.. See what march madness does to people
yea i thought the egg drop soup tasted weirdly like cum, and then i suddenly remembered what happened last night.
i'm never eating chinese again.
We should tie ourselves together anytime there is any type of alcohol involved. It's the safest way. I either end up with freshmen or weird ex bfs. You end up with a large cowboy. This is not good for us
She's using our floating beer pong table as an air mattress to sleep on.
Smuggling a beer bottle full of vodka out of the bar with a tampon as a plug for the top of the bottle wasn't one of my classiest ideas... but your hangover proves it was resourceful and effective. Your welcome.
The way I see it, everyone on campus has a fake, but I'm the only person who actually makes beer in their dorm.
just filed my taxes drunk as balls. i may be going to jail.
Is it socially acceptable to stop at the strip club for the lunch buffet on my way to the airport?
I need a costume
Dude just wear a bra or something hahaha
I need time to grow out my leg hair and not be sad anymore
Has anyone ever blacked out at an art show your dad brought you to?
I told her I'd rather set my hair on fire than sleep with her again. In retrospect, that was probably too harsh. My eye is still swollen shut.
He bent me in ways I couldn't imagine.. and im a gymnast.
She is beauty she is grace
she’s masturbsting in front of an open window while drunk af 9am
i thought you had class
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