WHY DOES GOD HATE MY DICK
Jack off faster Americas best dance crew is beyonce themed
She has 260 profile pics. In 260 she's ugly and in 255, she's making the peace sign with her hands...
I just got over my period in 3 days...I believe that is god's way of saying "go fuck an amazingly attractive Italian boy on vacation"
halloween is SO much better on drugs, why didn't anyone let us know about this when we were kids
Nothing like hearing a USA chant while getting head. God bless America.
I just broke a sweat shaving my own vagina. Something has got to change.
I think a van full of parolees just blew me kisses. Thoughts?
I'm sorry, but the "Hobbit Slam" has to be a sex move.
I spent a lot of time in their kitchen cause I was convinced that the living room was gonna fall... Sorry for not warning you about that.
I Have a huge scrape on my knee and I need a better excuse than dry humping on a park bench...
you wouldn't let anybody come in after ten. everybody was standing outside and you just yelled "BEING PUNCTUAL IS IMPORTANT" and slammed the door. i dont think you should be allowed to have parties anymore
it concerns me that i was already that drunk at 10
THE STRIPPER HAD A GUN JOHN!
I just want a simple guy who likes cats, tattoos, and doing coke off my tits.
I'm so happy we share a mutual love of laughing at religion.
Randomize
