your room smells of hookers.
And success
i think you know its gunna be a bad day when it starts with throwing up into a red plastic cup
After Sake bombs he tried to puke into an alluminum beer bottle and shot vomit streaks in a perfect V out the sides of his mouth and hit BOTH girls he had bought drinks for that night. He was like an Icon of Cock-blocking yourself.
we fucked while standing on a ladder. challenging, but worth it.
She gives pretty bad head, but when it's in her dad's Lexus SUV it's tough to complain.
I just met his other fuck buddy...I am thinking of befriending her just to fuck with him...manuplating my roommates into hating each other is boring me i need something else to do
My clothes are covered in blood and I feel like I drank a gallon of elephant cum...it's safe to say I'm hungover
I am in his childhood bedroom and I feel like his trophies are applauding me and his stuffed bunny is disgusted with me. Did you know he was a mathlete?
The bouncer was just about to kick Sarah out for getting with this guy 'too physically'. I told him that was 'her style' and he let them stay. Banter.
If you've ever wanted to get filthy in a Catholic church before 2 on a Wednesday, I might be your guy.
WHY DOES HE HAVE TO CALL WHEN I'M MASTURBATING?! This time I'm really pissed. It's like he knows he's depriving me of orgasms.
This guy is walking around with a deer head on. Honestly what the fuck
All I've done for this 11 hour car ride is kegel and listen to our sex playlist so your dick better be good and ready
Blame the bisexuality and move on?
Please wake up and help me figure out how I woke up on the floor with my head under the couch
Randomize
