Excuse me do you have gonnorhea?
A little girl and i are having a face making battle in mcdonalds
She started it, but I totally finished it.
google image searching george stephanopoulos at 1 AM on a saturday night...once again
oh and i really hope miley falls off this mountain she is climbing
He keeps saying he loves me and ruining perfectly good conversations.
my mom used to put diet coke in my bottle. i can pretty much handle anything.
So tasty. Tasty like a vagina with ninjas in it
I can't remember where my feet are. All I can see are colors, and all I can feel is terror. The lollipop was a bad idea.
I tried to talk to him, but he didn't recognize me at first. I had to show him the top of my head and then he remembered.
i feel like i should invite him over so he can cockblock my roommate one last time before he graduates. for old times sake, ya know
words I never want to hear dad say again: "Trevor you sexy man you"
After closing we did it on every flat surface in the bar. Best use a coaster if you're coming to happy hour today.
Should I get the rainbow boxer breifs???
As your boyfriend, this is a level of gay that even I can't handle.
I shouldn't be drunk at 3 pm but alas, here we are...
It's going to be like a slumber party but with ketamine
Randomize
