There are rumors he has a square penis....ill do anything though....
So.. My internet got red-flagged at work because i did a search on "midigit strippers las vegas" This may be hard to explain...
We all have a cross to bear. Yours just happens to be attracting gay men.
I told her that if she blew me I would give her the empty pizza box in the fridge.... Why did she agree?
Swear to god, if I have to wingman for you on my honeymoon I'm gonna be pissed
I wish! That ended in 2001 when we all got collectively band from the Settle Inn. As a group we are also band from social events at the zoo. It's impressive really.
He was my shower sex Sherpa last night. And we both made it safely up the mountain.
I just got carded by a ten year old.
I just did a drunk experiment to find out what it looks like when you turn a burner on the stove on while wearing night-vision goggles. I may be blind in my right eye now.
I woke up with a stapler in my ass. Don't even complain to me.
I'm ready to sell my soul to the strip club tonight
i just called my dad a bottom. he agreed
for real. if he messaged me that i'd have made his penis cower in a corner.
This bird just went for my eyes. Does he think I'm dead???
Did you actually just quote Ace Ventura during a sext!?
You know it
Dammit now I have to marry you
Randomize
