To answer your question of whether I "went back," tits just informed me I was kicked out for falling off my barstool and passing out on the floor...
Non-Jews are for practice
dude, my face is all kinds of fucked up right now. and don't even start with i told you so...
shit is crazy. i just keep thinking that this kid growing inside Emily used to live in my balls.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I needed to borrow my dads nail clippers and next to it was an industrial size box of condoms if that wasnt bad enough I dropped the clippers behind the bed and discovered hundreds of used condoms
it's not our fault the pink and the sink are so close together.
I put the beer in my little red riding hood basket.
Still drunk just puked in the meat cooler tried to clean it up with ham. Its not working
Would the plural word for douche be deese? "Look at these deese bags"?
Are you high?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He woke up in the ambulance thinking he was still in the club.
The bartender from Thursday remembered me... And gave me a FLAMING BUCKET of alcohol.
Im rolling a blunt of encouragement for you to return to
He looks like he got hit by a weed-eater with chlamydia
Wearing the 'Let's Party' thong feels weird without you...
I made a nest in his bed. I'm not leaving
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