I told her it just looked small because my balls were gigantic. She bought it.
Princeton has an emergency contraception worldwide website. It is in moments like these that I love my university
turns out the guy i was dating because he was a cop was not actually a cop. i learned this as he got arrested by real cops.
she then came into the room and yelled I'M GOING TO BE A COCK BLOCK for 5 minutes
I didn't black out, the guy in the Men In Black costume erased my memory
MCAT status: Day 64, no longer can remember what sex is like.
We have to give a final comment in english, i think i might say "i learned it's a bad idea to make out with people in your classes who have girlfriends."
The doctor told me if I woke up with a broken foot and don't know how it happened, I might want to look into getting treatment.
I just had a flash of memory of me asking all of the girls if they were on their periods. If they said yes I said it made us moon sisters.
He said he could outsmoke me so I challenged him to a weed duel. I don't always very competitive but when I do...
I ate her out in the bathroom and she did my makeup. Man i love being a lesbian
God, please protect all woman from micro-penises
Well I didn't know she was a dominatrix...so I kind of just went with it
I'm so glad you haven't fallen off any more yachts
I just got to my parents hungover as hell. My dad could tell and said "theres only one cure for a hangover" and handed me a beer. This morning went from a 0 to 10 in an instant.
Randomize
