Do you still like to have your hair pulled?
No, I never liked having my hair pulled. I think you have me confused.
I just sat in the Taco Bell drive-thru waiting for a trash can to take my order. Yes, that high.
Just spent the last three hours in the library successfully refreshing facebook
I voted for him because his wife supports his raging sex life.
I don't know if it's lucky or if it really just makes my tits look THAT good, but I've never NOT gotten laid with this bra on
i had to take off my light up shamrock necklaces, my professor was getting suspicious.
In all seriousness, if tomorrow night becomes a heated game of Which Ex Gets To Take The Plastered Birthday Girl Home, I'm going to bow out with my integrity intact.
Good morning! Spongebob is on channel 257 when you wake up. Help yourself to breakfast. You were great last night. See you when i get back.
my goal was to make out with as many people dressed as batman as possible. I have my priorities.
I think the 8 yr old is hitting on me and they just prayed for the salvation of third world countries
I feel like at this point in my life I should be dating someone who doesn't run out of all his money on Mondays and have to wait til fridy to buy his weed
I'm sending lingerie pics that I took yesterday. I fully prepared for this holiday
He told me to be a woman and make him dinner. So I threw a bagel at him and went out to dinner.
Just had a threesome for the second time in my life. I don;t even enjoy threesomes. Too much effort.
HOW DO THESE THINGS KEEP HAPPENING TO YOU?
She had a toddler. It threw up and then some guy said party foul and put it on the porch. Going back next Friday.
Randomize
