worst 3rd wheel sitch ever. i'm crammed into a booth with him and chubs mcgee and his hand is between her legs. thank youuu karma.
I just saw Sharon Stone's cootch in high def. I think I'll stay gay.
I hooked up with a Michael Jackson impersonator last night. Too soon?
You know how I told you I don't have many naked pics? Apparently that changed last night.
Just tried to tap morse code on the wall seperating our beds to tell you I was awake and ready to smoke
Walk of shame... his parents made me go to church with them first. in my club top sweat pants and slippers. i just slapped god in the face
our health teacher's ringtone is Bad Romance and she has a tramp stamp. i will not skip this class, ever.
Min and u sung xhionubjs. Cause that's what u kiij like a xhionunk
He must have sensed I was about to trade him in...he's really stepped up his sex game
It's like shitshowville, population: those girls.
Ohh I see how it works, eat pussy and I get Reese's pieces.
Oh my lord it is too early in the morning to be that horny freak
my vagina doesn't wear a watch
I got a 5 dollar bill, 1 condom, and no alcohol. I get payed on Thursday. Let's do this shit.
excused from jury duty. THAT hungover...
He kept apologizing that the nerve damage makes him take a while to finish. Meanwhile he gave me 3 orgasms and a leg cramp
Only you could benefit from a reckless driver
Randomize
