You know your creepy when you look at recently tagged facebook photos of girls you want to hook up with and they include prom pictures
You drink too much
No, I drink just the right amount - too often.
ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
chris hansen is no longer pursuing child predators.let's celebrate
i'll bring the hard lemonade and lube
she is graduated, working for the school, and puking in the bathroom of a frat house. she wants brush her hair so she doesnt "look trashy". im in love.
I'm never telling my kids not to take ecstasy, never. Idk what my mom was thinking.
Its your turn to fuck our RA next time she threatens us with an underage.
Thanks for having 911 ready when I jumped off the balcony
He's cheating on his wife, and he's judging me for eating McDonalds
Plan B, arranged marriage to a rich Indian, is rapidly becoming Plan A. Fuck Finals.
I'm pretty sure the guy in front of me at Walmart doesn't have good plans. It's one am he is buying a flash light and black bandanna
Best compliment ever: Being told that you really understand sex by a professional. After she gave you a HANDJOB.
Ehhh, contemplating pain killers and fruit snacks if that's any indication.
I mean we all knew i was gonna get arrested eventually but shoplifting is lame so dont tell anyone. Well just let them assume public nudity or something
I got sriracha sauce on my mask while I was eating fast food, now wearing it makes me hungry
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