New requirements. My future husband must have a nose ring and wear headbands.
We are no longer friends.
you know how i said i wouldn't send that pic message of your lofted bed falling from you fucking a fat chick? that was after i sent it to your mom
on the bus. saw a kid get off at a red light, puke on the sidewalk, and get back on.
So I realized I'm not completely sober when the automatic toilet flushed and I screamed
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dude, i turned on the light and asked if they were ok and they STILL didn't stop. Most determined sex EVER.
We should invent fake asshair for you to wear so you can experience my pain for a day.
Our neighbors just passed us a blunt from their deck, and are hooking us up.
I just baked them cookies. We're friends now.
Her roomates have been scoring her hookups. I got 8.9, best of the week!
Its raining shots and i keep catching them in my mouth like you with dicks shits crazy
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nothing like snapchatring dick pics to a\nMarried woman while your girlfriend destroys Taco Bell in the next room. Almost caught, worth it. Got boobs back
We almost ended up sober because of u!!
I'm gonna give the church their tithe, and the rest is a down payment on boobs.
That shit was hard as fuck. It felt like a mountain entering my vagina.
it'll be like the notebook except for with way more of my penis
Whatever you wanna call it i just wanna get railed tonight
Randomize