All I have in my fridge is chocolate cake, pizza, spicy mayo sauce, beer, and weed. I love college
you made me watch la bamba, and then you yelled at me for disrespecting your mexican heritage.
Tomorrow will not be complet unless someone eats me out. Just sayin
I fucked him in the bathroom at Cedar Point. if it hadn't been for me already combining my two favorite things in the world the whole bathroom thing would have been a little disgusting.
Hate the very realistic pregnancy dreams. Like my dream when I birthed the pirate ships. SO REAL...
I like yr title more along "the hot Russian I have sex with."
The used rubbers I threw behind her bed all semester must have landed on the baseboard heater. They went up in smoke when she turned on the heat last night.
The bed I'm sleeping in has a headboard only handcuffs could love. I'm gonna pick up a local dude and wreck that.
don't mind me. just hanging out in this cool air conditioned Babies R Us until the liquor store next door opens.
There is an alarming amount of food in my bra.
Ended up in some house where this dude has a $1200 leopard cat
I love you more than sex with randoms.... and we all know how much I love that shit.
random boy in my bed. last night wasnt a dream. fuck.
Everytime after he came, he'd laugh uncontrolably for ten mintutes. He was sober..
New rock bottom. Woke up at 7 am fully clothed in a bathtub full of water. I hate myself.
Randomize
