Just threw up in airport security. Happy holidays.
Just used my last prints at the library for brackets instead of final reviews. Hello March.
It will be a surprise...all i can say is stripper clown
His bond is $50,000..margarita Monday might get cancelled
i just woke up to a text from him apologizing for making me eat a full lemon
There's two big trays of water in our freezer. I just hope they freeze by Saturday. for the ice luge.
its Wednesday...
they're reeeeeally big trays
merry christmas to all and to all I give the mystery rash.
He was so drunk he was throwing the bowling balls into other lanes on purpose. He still beat my high score thought.
When in doubt, it's too much cheese
fuck whipped cream. I'd eat vegetables off those abs
We smoked a blunt in a stall where a drag queen was fucking a bartender in the ass. So theres gonna be a second date :)
They won't let me buy alcohol in the airport until 9am. Super judgemental
I don't want to go back to the suburbs. Being drunk in public isn't ok and theres too many children. Don't make me.
Well you went to the bar with your crutches last night & everyone including the DJ started chanting "put your crutches in the air"
He bought me a bottle of Malibu. I think I could love this guy.
I've loved people for a lot less.
Randomize
