Omg just want to confirm: got drunk, naked in street, fucked in bathroom and puked on bart.
Do u kno any dealers?
I've officially lost all respect for you, dad.
Well we ran into the cornfields when the cops got there. We'd been hiding in there for 45 mins when he asks me "So this wasn't exactly how I'd planned this but I thought I'd ask. How do you feel about oral sex?"
we did anal to Party In The USA and he busted to Firefies .. felt like we were fucking in a middle school dance
I guess we had a small kitchen fire somehow when we decided to bake fruitroll ups and croutons...
hey, when you wake up, search yourself on youtube
my sister already found it, were watching it right now. i give it 2 thumbs up.
were trying to schedule when i can give him head in between classes.
Briing, briiing- tricycle ridden. Where is my crown?
You better wipe the dick of your lips before you come smoke this blunt.
There are two things I love in this world. Dick and cats. Why can't I just have dick and cats forever
All of the hungover. I've changed not showered but can't quite make it to the booze.
WE'RE IN THE RED ZONE PLAY THRU THE PAIN
My exam ends at 4pm so I plan to be passed out in the bar by 5pm. Want to join me?
Apparently, the Mormons have taken over airports. I was told by a befuddled looking clerk I couldn't buy a beer with breakfast before 6am.
I was like, booze is the closest thing I have to a father. Don't pour daddy down the sink
He made me pay for half of dinner. Fucking feminist revolution.
Randomize
