Is it wrong to beat off to a girl to determine if you like her or not?
How am I a tease?
Dude you flashed me ur vagina and walked away.
ONLY PART OF IT.
just as they were cutting his pants off he made em stop & said "everyone knows about shrinkage right".
mom and dad are asleep. time to fish my half-full bottle of wine out from under my bed and give this christmas visit a pick-me-up.
"half-full" seems a little optimistic for the turn your night is taking.
Where the hell is he. I called him crying for weed and sex you would think that would signal some urgency.
Now I'm at the gym and I never want to leave. It's a combo of adderall and endorphins and I don't want it to go away
Every time I drink before 5 somebody's pet dies
Stop drinking before 5
Easier said than done
Ok. Here's the plan. Take your hand (whichever is closest), summon all your nerve, and just stick it right down his pants.
I love you.
im in the library and there's this guy on a computer just staring at a google image of beer. finals week is rough.
It's midsummers eve. A.k.a. come over so we can get drunk and wear leaf crowns
i need to stop establishing animals as safe words. Giraffe and Penguin are really awkward words to say during sex
There's something really beautiful about walk of shaming past the Capitol.
YOU TOOK A FUCKING SNAP OF ME TRYING TO PEE! I'M GOING TO FUCK YOU WITH THE BUSINESS END OF A RUTED RAKE!
he told me he liked me . I thought we were just fuck buddies . This ruins everything!
The ass gains better be worth it
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