Michael Jackson and Farah Fawcett are dead
NOOOOOOOO not MJ! Someone tell the paramedic to grab him by the heart and just "Beat it"
to be honest..when i was little i used to think sharks can swim out of drains and eat people
How am I suppose to look him in the face when I know a commercial lasts longer than he does?
spending the week with her family was quite possibly the longest ive ever gone without having a boner
I have only been in this city 3 nights and there are already 4 bars I can never go back to again.
i've officially fucked a sailor, a policeman and a biker. I've never noticed my Village People fetish until now...
not my fault hes the one that tried to cuddle after. said he wanted to spoon away the shame.
Woke up in the front yard with a chalupa and a firecracker in my back pocket. It's what the founding fathers would want
I'm not sure, 7-8, the last bit was a rush of at least three blended together. Basically you fucked me so stupid that I can't even recall the number of orgasms.
So you know, I'm making that my facebook status.
No more co-pays for contraceptives. Whoever says Obama is a bad guy has clearly never had a pregnancy scare.
Ummm didn't i have pubes when i went to bed last night?
THERE IS WEED IN MY OVEN. HOW AM I EVER SUPPOSED TO MAKE CHICKEN PARMESAN WITH WEED IN MY OVEN.
Apparently I showed all your grooms men my vagina to prove I did not have underwear on. Awesome
At least he uses his lack of impulse control for chaotic good instead of chaotic evil
I'm not gonna be naked if your not here. Thats like a waste of nakedness
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