Goal for tonight: Make one last drunken mistake for the semester.
dude i just saw a drunk guy attempt to get by IUPD and throw a uprooted bleacher seat over the edge of the stadium. funniest thing of life.
details please.
they caught him 10 rows from the top. the first thing he said was "wait I can explain, i just have to throw this over first."
just fucked my old babysitter, gotta love block parties
He walked into the party with a case on one shoulder and a boom box on the other of course I fucked him
What can I say, we hook up during the holidays.. We're a seasonal couple
He bought me shots at the bar as his way of of paying me back for Plan B
there was a trail of blood coming out of one of the bathroom stalls. thought of you
Your brother came in a girls mouth for the first time last night... Ah the tales told whilst buying minors beer.
another part of my inner child died when i emptied my crayon bank for dollar beer night.
Don't worry we will all be making bad decisions soon
That's the most comforting thing I've heard in months
"Every minute you spend hanging out with David is a minute you could spend meeting someone new, who isn't a huge douche" - Buddha
I just think that exercising will really get in the way of my painkiller induced nap time rituals. There's gotta be a better way.
I was late because I helped this old romanian lady mow her lawn at 2AM.
I really don't know how I went from having a few drinks to waging war against ghosts in my apartment but here we are
Morning fuck and a coffee. ARE YOU READY TO CONQUER THE GALAXY WITH ME??
Randomize
