I have a feeling we are going to become cougars together.
Riding home in a carseat. Worst. Night. Ever.
Kay wants to put chicklets in our cooters to make beavers and take pix captioned Got Wood? Taking public transit does scary things to her.
he was wearing a tuxedo, i was naked...it's a long story.
that awkward moment when your booty call gets snowed in at your place.
yea man just watch out- theres a shitload of broken glass in your bed
I am convinced that after two dates and a few adult sleepovers that he still doesn't know my name.
It feels like one of my ribs evaporated.
You made a glowstick headband with a helium balloon tied around it and climbed a tree in high heels. I was impressed.
Don't tell me 'the Fonzie' doesn't work. Went to see Shakespeare high and gave the sign to the dude playing Macbeth. Now at a cast party getting blown. All hail the Fonz.
If he survived pride he can survive a gay bar
I feel horrible. I brought her to your house like a late night pizza delivery and dropped her off.
Also I can show up hungover, fall asleep at my desk, and smell like a bottle of whiskey, and they still like me more then my shitty co worker
He was basically a horny puppy - following me around all night and kept sticking his hand down my pants.
I promise your sink was clogged before I threw up in it.
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