just went home with some hot chick. she has posters of the jonas brothers in her room. i basically ran out of the house.
I just opened a gallon of milk that is good through the 10th of January- I hope I can say the same for myself.
If I die and they 'assume' it's natural causes, just go with it.
just took my birth control pill with a shamrock shake. happy st. patrick's day
halfway through eating me out he goes 'oh that reminds me i have to buy fish for good friday'
oh yeah I know that guy. he's legit. slept in my closet a few times
I'm pretty sure getting a blow job behind a bar in Rome while her little sister is throwing up in a dumpster not 5 feet away, gives entirely new meaning to the phrase "When in Rome"
As an added bonus, you will have a "25 blowjobs a month" voucher, expiring thirty days after the first initial bj.
Having a vagina does not stop me from believeing my balls are bigger than yours.
It's settled. One of us is going to bang her brother. The world demands justice and he's hot. We'll be the justice league if it were made of alcoholic whores
My roommate told me he found me naked in the shower puking and when he asked why I was naked I said "you can't wear clothes in a shower"
And thanks! There are perks to polyamory. And birthday orgies are one of them
Yeah plus that night got so disgusting it's basically a repressed memory anyway
I'm not the type to go to a guys house...in your case his boat...and sleep with them..I mean I have in the past but I'm trying to be more serious and grown up
Apparently I was directing traffic outside of Keeneland. Apparently I'm not a police officer. Who knew....
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