Have fun with your cool freestyling girlfriend!
She can rap better than you any day
oh good, I think they're gone
the painters?
my herpes
so she asking me "is it okay to have dangling labias?"
I am highly attracted to the men and that's all i can say. I do not clap and make noises but i do turn to the side and say how i'd do incredible things to them if given the chance
he came over wasted, used the bathroom, drank some water, and fell asleep holding my hand. what kind of a fuck buddy does that??
i convinced her i need a blow job every morning to wake up because i have a medical condition.
He shit in a sock dude, you can't come back from that
We were playing hot potato with real potatoes at 3am
I opened my eyes this morning, looked at the sunlight and made this hangover my bitch.
First memory of my senior year: Going into registration still drunk from last night.
Oh, fuck yeah. I swear I came with every bite. Not even joking. Messiest meal ever.
Wow, thanks for ruining pizza for me. I didn't think it was possible.
Yo, go checkout Kerri's Instagram quick! There's like 12 pics of her fucking some guy in a bar's bathroom. GO GO GO GO!!!!
Your "dubstep at ceilis" resulted in a random naked guy busting into my room and peeing all over my bathroom
The other day, he sent me a snapchat of his dick in the forest. He captioned it "nature nudes."
Florida is balancing how much this place sucks with how many vodkas you can have to cope in order to still be allowed on the plane to leave
Randomize
