She's just bitter because she lost all the weight only to discover she doesn't have a pretty face after all.
I'll let you put expensive food in me, but really, not much else.
halloween costumes for girls are easy, slutty teacher, slutty cop, slutty nurse, etc...
exactly, that's why i want something interesting
slutty neuroscientist?
we were on a sandy mattress. i was wearing a sweatshirt with a poodle on it and eating a whopper jr. i wouldn't have fucked me either.
In Denver there are more bars per capita than any other city also the healthiest city. That means lots of drunk girls and no fatties.
Does this sound normal?...She's ironing on pictures of her dead cat to all of her green clothes...
I'm concerned you might be passed out on a random rooftop right now. Not concerned enough to do anything about it. Hope you're alive. Goodnight.
Dude. All those hangovers I never had came back with a vengeance. I just opened the door of this car to barf. The car was not motionless. We are on the autobahn.
Having vodka and cokes for lunch at work today because absolutely ZERO fucks are being given.
Sorry I drunkenly insulted your air mattress last night. You still could have fucked me on it though.
It took 6 cruisers to bust the party last night. Cop asked if the theme was a beach party. I said I would fucking hope so with 8 tons of sand in the garage
Dude, for twins they have shockingly different blowjob styles.
STOP FUCKING MY SISTERS!!!!
Let's celebrate that I used a condom
It was like 10 tiny penises being shoved in my vagina.
He's going to be in the air guitar championships in june. Need I say more.
Randomize
