Do they fuck in the end of "Lady and the Tramp" or am i just wasting my time
You know, I really only think drinking is a problem if you're not good at it.
im spending all my christmas money on new years parafanalia aka things I will ingest or lose by the next morning
how many days can you live off of Vicodin and frosty?? im going on 4 days......
well, 500 bucks doesn't grown on trees, and i need that bear suit for any chance of vagina access.
our conversations pretty much only consist of the phrase 'fuck you'. and the sex is fantastic. we've got a great thing going here.
If you're not washing nut sweat off of your forehead this morning I'm disappointed in you
Well, I'm off to go seduce a gay man. In 10 years when I'm 300 pounds, sitting in a mumu surrounded by my 500 cats, remind me of this text. That way I can be like "ohhh THERE'S where I went wrong!!"
My mouth tastes like what I imagine a hobo's skin would taste like.
Thanks for the cold. I shartted and sat through a whole soccer game. James made 3 scores.
And I just want to be like your tongue is not a FUCKING sword
also, sleeping with your chipotle guy sounds like a good idea until you want chipotle on your day off and have to look somewhat presentable to acquire said chipotle.
My mom just walked in on me naked taking a shit and packing a bowl...the only comment she makes is, she wants her Tupperware back after my pot's out of it. Best mom ever.
was i wearing any clothes at that point?
socks and a thong
There's a big ass bed, hella ecstasy, and I can guarantee you'll regret every second that you remember.
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