What happened to our ballroom dancing plans
dude i was like still drunk, taking pictures of her while she was naked and asleep and she woke up
haha what'd she say
i don't know man, something about us dating. but i never talked to her sober so i said i was making breakfast and snuck out of her house. close calls man WTF
In retrospect, it was a terrible idea, going down on her with these ulcers in my mouth.
Either your mom needs to stop making spagetti or we need to lay off the anal. I cant tell you how much im in pain.
Spagetti cuz im not giving up the other one.
The worst part is I think my tongue cut his penis and now he wont talk to me.
Well, both are illegal but one involves my vagina a whole lot less.
Shut up. It sucks being the ugly friend, I would know, but someones gotta play the role
he described going down on me as being like 'entering a jungle of deliciousness and fur
I demanded respect from my fuck buddy. Drunk me is not fun.
Glow parties are what I live for
Your priorities in life astound me
Annnnddddd this chick is using a hand puppet made of a sock to give her research presentation...
Let me know when ur ready so I can throw up one last time then brush my teeth
She said you told her you were ready to be a dad. We just got back from our purchase of the morning after pill. That took me 2 hours of convincing. No more fucking my sister.
1. Thanks. 2. No.
I'm at the level of despair that only Panda Express can fix
Oh good, bag of butt plugs is in my predictive text now
Typing the whole thing out was getting to be such a chore
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