"it" just moved
She has HUUUUUUUGE nipples
i just fingered the ice cream at home instead of getting a spoon
been there done that
I just put a picture of what I imagine Rob's dick looks like on it on my vision board. thank you Oprah!
Drawing dicks in the frost on people's windshields is a rare joy I allow myself while walking to my 8 AM class.
Oh my god it just tripped me out that I used to be a baby, I had to tell you.
When they saw it was the 7th inning of the baseball game one took off running for the beer stand while his friend is yelling "BUY THE KEG"!
Not sure if jager bombs can cure tuberculosis, but its a theory im testing as we speak
What's the most polite way to say "Congrats on losing weight, but no one is happy your boobs got smaller."
Is it bad that all my wine bottles have teeth marks in the cork?
I just can't promise there won't be a reason to hit you in the face with a dildo again in the future.
was I really that bad?
you army crawled across the kitchen floor, turned the cat into "super kitty" and crawled into the dog cage
He did 5 five hand stand push ups and took off his shirt for a barbarian flex. Some girl took off her shirt and threw it at him
if you come you're not allowed to wear pants. if you arrive wearing pants you won't be wearing them long.
You can make out without kissing
Explanation needed
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