I like bacon cheeseburgers and the pussycat dolls
Does that mean you want me to loosen up your buttons at carls jr?
his text ended with ... everyone knows dot dot dot equals infer sexy time
Did you ever feel like going into a planned parenthood and performing an abortion in front of them?
Umm..who the fuck is this?
Oh shit
I woke up with like grass burns all over my body, i'm pretty sure i made out with someone under a bus. . . but i'm not sure
Ladystoner tip: if eyes are bloodshot, lime green eyeliner makes them appear less red. its basic artt.
Party at my house. Beach themed. Clothing optional.
Wouldn't that make it "Nude Beach Themed?"
We are going to get clementines. And shoot them out of a ballon launcher. That's after we come up to the ivy with a bullhorn and reck havoc. Where are you.
I woke up with her dog licking the wedding cake out of my ear and her sister finishing our Jaeger
He must have sensed I was about to trade him in...he's really stepped up his sex game
Day drinking straight vodka out of a Mountain Dew can being towed behind a kayak on a raft. And no, there is no time difference, it really is 10 am.
So this is where people who peaked in high school come to drink?
Also one of my neighbors is blasting "pumped up kicks" and possibly butchering some chickens
the reputation of my dick game is on the line. You're killing the team, here, G
i don't know when underwear became an acceptable clothing choice for parties, but god help me i hope this isn't a passing trend.
I can see. My condolences to your vagina.
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