I need you to promise me that the first one to find out our kids smoke weed, takes the weed so we can smoke it ourselves
I just woke up with the words DO IT on my hand and six beers in my purse.
I puked for half an hour, but I went and danced afterwards, and that made me feel better.
You are so irish.
I don't think it's considwred fine dining when you're passing out at golden palace in chinatown at 4 am with you boss who happens to be wearing a dress.
don't say the first was when I crawled under into the dressing room
Honestly I'm so excited to go to bed I feel as if I don't deserve to be in my early twenties.
Ok. I'm gonna smoke some weed and look at some elephants without you then.
I had to hose off vomit off my driveway at 9 am.....so hot
He kept kissing me on the cheek when I was pretending to sleep while he cried
I mean we don't talk anymore but I still see him around wearing that sweater he stole from me after we had sex
No it's like. I don't respect you. And I think you're a terrible person but. I still wanna bone it out.
I'd still fuck that
You'd fuck a dead moose
Quite possible
There is no rule that you can't be in a room with more than one dick that's been inside you.
Man, I miss taking bong rips in my room. Now they are bringing dogs around so all my stuff is hidden in random places up in the woods. I literaly have to hunt and gather just to get high.
I basically spent the entire weekend in bed with that red head.Every time I tried to leave she got me too horny to think straight. I was kidnapped by vagina
Randomize
