my boyfriend just said he'd go down on me if I gave him my password to facebook
I woke up this morning and was hoping we drank enough last night to have a unicorn drawn on my wrist. Good News: We did.
I wish costco sold astroglide.
i wish my brain was less awake, and didn't try and picture what you were talking about.
I have one brief flash of having his dick in my hand. that's all I remember.
And we hooked up in the carwash. I told you our creative juices were flowing today.
Just witnessed a circumcision at clinical. i suddenly feel a sense of reconciliation over every guy who's done me dirty...
He made me a mix cd. There is obviously something wrong with him.
i just found this napkin with your number on it in my jacket pocket. it reads amy, drawing of a wine bottle and a house
I think it was the free bomb shots from the creepy bolivians that sent us over the edge
Hey he's not bad, although he did have a glass eye
I don't even fuck like that, he just happened to be in the right place at the right drunk.
Who says no to sex and donuts?!
I got home at 1 am on a weeknight with lube in my hair. I'd say it was a successful first date.
4 pharmacies and not one had Plan B. If this is gods way of telling me it's time for a child, he can fuck off.
she said she doesn't remember seeing me at all last night. ...I was with her for six hours, there's no way she could have been blackout the whole time
Randomize
