The best part about the NBA starting up is I get to see Charles Barkley make a fool out of himself for 8 months
I'll tell you what, we couldn't have asked for better binge-drinking weather.
My penis hasn't been this frustrated since I was like 13 and I awkwardly got boners at school dances
I know the scar will be in an obvious place, that's why I'm certain it'll score me cancer blowjobs
the higher we get, the more he looks like ray charles.
Whatever. It was high school. Back then I'd blow anyone who had enough room between their chest and their steering wheel for my head to fit.
I just want uncharted vagina. Fresh and ripe.
Just got invited out of group to take shots after hearing her gay friend say "why would I give him my alcohol so you can suck his dick. It's going to be a good night
Trying to find a card for this engagement party. Can't find one that says "you met each other 5 months ago, cant wait to get the popcorn out and watch this one fall apart"
just for future reference, lake water is NOT mix for hard stuff. nor is it an adequate substitute.
Well after the shots I danced with a homeless guy, split my toe on broken glass, and had a 20 piece mcnugget. Who says postgrad life is boring.
You ran through a field yelling "I'm frolicking! I'm frolicking!" Then fell on your face. How is your nose today, doll?
So I can officially say that someone has licked whipped cream off my nipples. Go senior year
I just started talking about how noodles were so good
I dont remember you getting a condom thrown at you. I think I had a concusion
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