"You squeeze, we tiip biiiiiig" JB
at a bar and heard one girl tell another her tampon string was showing she goes i dont want it in anymore anyways. then proceeds to pull out her tampon in the middle of the bar and leave it on a plate. ewwww
do you ever lay in the bath and watch the blood hit the water?
EWW. Don't discuss your period with me. You can go shave your back now.
We had one of those mutual "I know your on a dating website, I won't tell if you won't" glances.
I didn't think moms care packages could get better than greygoose, weed & double stuffed oreos, but she just snet me a chocolate bar full of mushrooms.
You destroyed the landscape if my vagina FOREVER.
Am I a bad person for getting my ex to DD me and a random hookup home last night?
Discovery: there is a folder in my pictures labeled "Your Name and cats"
She climbed up the stairs with three brownies in one fist, two in the other, and one in her mouth. Also, she opened the bedroom door with her foot. I may be in love.
Just whatever you do, don't neglect the balls.
Waiting on the notification from my fitness pal that tells me I'm an alcoholic
Yeah I blacked out in a wiener costume.... I think I'm ready to come home now.
Quick, I need a picture of your dick. Don't ask questions, just show me your genitals.
What part of I just want to watch porn, eat Taco Bell, and masturbate did you not understand?
You asked me how red your eyes were... they were shut.
Randomize
