it's too hot outside to masturbate.
I got oddly confused when she started talking in third person in bed.
I asked about his 3 inch scar on his chest. It's from when he had to castrate a bull on the estancia. Apparently this is how good bull meat is made.
guess who has a date tonight
look at you growing up, going on dates before she hops into bed
She posted on her FB that he moved out...It's like she wants me to fuck him.
So, your mugshot picture is behind the counter at B-Dubs, with the caption: "not allowed on premesis."
I expected to wake up with a sext of you posing nude and all I got was a missed call.....disappointed.
I'm sorry I think it was because I lost a chicken nugget in my purse and that's all that was on my mind until 4am
Adderal just makes me love life. I want to do so much. I just can't stop thinking about all the wonderful opportunities we have and how lucky we are and I want to make a difference in the world. I just have to reign in my brain and convince it that changing the world starts with a college degree, which depends on studying for these finals.
I probably should have waited until after the game to pity fuck him. You know, seeing as we lost.
I asked my mom if she could pick up something for me to drink since we ran out of orange juice and she goes "We have beer, champagne, and baileys. Drink one of those."
HOW THE FUCK CAN YOU NOT REMEMBER WHIPPING IT OUT AND PUTTING ON THE BAR?
By the way, you're banned for life.
I did my patriotic duty. I woke up next to a veteran this morning.
I was on antibiotics for a bladder infection and couldn't drink and you told me there was no longer room in your life for me.
There's nothing classy about a pregnant girl at a frat party...remember that.
Oh shit. My bra is undone and I'm pretty sure I peed on my sandal
Randomize
