Tickle wars 95% of the time end in sex.
Needless to say Beer Gardens severly frowns upon playing flip cups with real glasses.
i failed horribly. studying for that final was as pointless as Vinnie is to Jersey Shore
You know you hit rock bottom when you make out with a guy named after a cereal.
dude my 8 year old cousin is allowed to drink wine coolers. as long as its infront of my aunt. wtf
whatever. i don't care. i just want to be drunk wrapped in an american flag.
Me. You. Shitty green clothes from Savers that we will dub alligator costumes. Middle of the quad tomorrow at noon. Bring your alligator voice and the pearls before swine comic.
I need Jameson.
Yea? How do you think I feel? Your job during the delivery is to keep that flask ready. The moment our kid pops out, I'm taking a shot.
Worse than that. I caught my roommate jerking off to a topless stripper in gta 5.
She took a six hour road trip with me so I could have revenge sex with my ex's brother. That is the definition of a best friend.
I've just realized that today's rations have consisted of turkey bacon and jack Daniels.
Happiness is laying in bed, topless, pouring 4 packs of hot sauce on your taco bell.
Just saw a car towing a guy on skis drive by so that’s how Syracuse is doing today.
I need some buff guys to cuddle me and call me precious
It's a draw. You need to settle it in Smash, Soul Calibur, and/or rock-paper-scissors, the last of which Steve claims is bullshit.
Randomize
