You know your in college when you decide house chores with games of beer pong...
I didn't mind getting the stomach flu from him. we had great sex AND I'm seven pounds lighter
I wanted to take a shower but I forgot we made applesauce in it last night.
I mean its cheating, but i figure i've made out wiht married chicks before so its like a nicotine patch, quitting by doing less and less each day
I was just expressing concern for your pickle consumption.
3 things I learned last night: 1.) I'm not as light as I used to be. 2.) Sex on the roof of a convertible is a really bad idea. 3.) The hospital now has super glue pens for sealing minor cuts instead of stitches!
I got woken up by a construction worker, turns out I was laying in a hallway, naked and wrapped in a matress pad. To answer your question no, I did not study for this test I got David Hasselhoff drunk
But he buys me breakfast and goes down on me THATS HARD TO FIND
He screamed AMERICA, took a shot of vodka out of a Tupperware container, and then asked if he could see my tits
Weekend plan is a big bag of dope, delivery food, Bollywood marathon and masterbating my dick raw.
I worked so hard to shave everything last night. EVERYTHING. He WILL be answering my phone calls. Otherwise he's passing up awesome random birthday sex.
It's blow job season.
I have a better chance beating China's military with slap bracelets than this plan has of working.
Now just crop his dad out and add it to the spank bank.
when i saw him today i think my vagina did the equivalent of a stomach growl... its been to long
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