We video chatted for almost two hours. But I woke up with puke on my keyboard. The question of the day: were we still chatting when I vommed? No idea.
Starbucks introducing alcohol. i hear angels singing.
you ever feel like there is a sober person insided you pointing and laughing....?
Just saved her as "new hostess that randy banged" ...I forgot her name
NEVERCLEAR, NEVER AGAIN.
Pretty sure God shed a tear when I put 15 singles in the collection plate.
My lips are red and swollen. Solid proof that giving head is a viable alternative to lipstick and plumper.
definitely not taking the whole return culture shock so well...drinking a 100 proof rootbeer vodka float out of a german beer mass
I have discovered that there is nothing that a giant penis attached to a southern accent can't talk me into. yee-haw!
Wanna skype?
Can your lips gently and pleasantly suck on my balls via skype? If not, then no.
Want to go home, so casually slip my underwear in his pocket. Never seen him grin so big and say goodbye to his friends.
Whiskey chased with ice cubes? Here's a big FUCK THAT to that
all we have is white fucking wine this is a travesty it's christmas not a fucking funeral
Never thought having a box of Cheerios could get me laid. My new lucky charm hello girl in 2B
I looked so sad that Jessica gave me a bar of soap. So that's where I'm at.
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