The mall is playing a fucking country mix of lady marmalade.
welcome to maine.
he took off his pants and apologized in advance if I thought he was too small.
and then he proceeded to take what he called, a whip cream shower.
It's barely 9 am & I've already had an ice cube IN my vagina
not to be a dick but do you remember the names of all your friends i made out with after we broke up?
We got back together. The pastures weren't greener on the other side, the dicks were just smaller
I'm pretty sure the guy in front of me at Walmart doesn't have good plans. It's one am he is buying a flash light and black bandanna
What am I doing with my life
Sleeping with dudes who have peacocks apparently.
Ps I think male models just broke down outside or maybe gay German sex travelers
Too bad, iambic pentameter is a drunk specialty of mine.
Sorry I crashed a riding mower into your garage door. No hard feelings??
He has great stamina, he knows how to use his tongue, and he's hung like a goddamn Pegasus. I can overlook the man bun.
Between his smile and monumental dick even the virgin mary woulda blown that man and I am far from the virgin. I didn't stand a chance.
Don't get into any trouble on your trip
The only foreseeable trouble would be pregnancy, but I gotta be sterile otherwise I'm beating some pretty fucking incredible odds
It was only a blow job in his car. It's the same as giving a friend a back rub.
Randomize
