I am tired of kissing girls with mustaches.
Any girl that compares her vag to a hot ham sandwich is beyond a slut
MIND BOGGLER: batman and jesus are the same person. Think about it.
as soon as his mom opened the door to let me in the house she asked if i would like a shot
it's gonna be a great weekend
eat the baked goods on the counter at your own risk... i made them while i was angry and drunk so they most likely have pubes in them
Trying to find a reliable dealer on Rockfordmugshots.com. Guy arrested for 15 grams of coke could be him !
You realize those people have been ARRESTED recently. right.
That's totally the Emoji for "just ran into some girl who knows I know she had an abortion"
Hey! Welcome back! How was the bachelorette in Vegas?
A safari of penis I hurt to the core
I tried snowmobiling at 2 am. I broke my glasses. You're right. Things do get out of control.
i am laugh crying so hard the guy next door stopped playing guitar
Yes. That was the exact moment of my conscience clicking into instant high alert.
Today I learned I and my bar naps were the subject of a bar meeting.
how early is too early to start drinking over the gilmore girls revival
I will take a ruler to your dick so help me god
First walk of shame in 18 years. Divorce is going well.
Randomize
