Some guy on the train just glared at me. So I'm drinking tequilla out of a dixie cup. Go fuck yourself.
So I just went to student health services and on my way in there was a girl outside on her phone saying "I just dont want you to be angry" and on my way out she was saying "I have the side effects sheet right here" Someone started the semester off classy
I used to practice getting hit by cars.
Oh so it was one of those "I shouldn't have gotten in a cab with a random 21 year old girl" kinda nights.
I told the girl who was peeing in the garbage can she must have had a lot of upper body strength.
I just got a mental picture of us having sex in a trash can.
No worries. It'll grow back. I mean, hey, my eyebrows grew back after he shaved them off. So it's all good.
I mean turning down birthday sex is never the answer
I can never go back to Jacksonville. We think I may have punched a child in the face while on acid...
I'm going to text my booty call and tell him nevermind, that I got the job finished by myself. That will teach him to text back faster.
This lesson is brought you by a psychology class.
Well I just put wine in my tea
Officially crunch time. It's my last year of grad school and I've yet to get blown in a school library. The parking garage was less than a block away though.
Quit giving me a hard time, whens the last time you got head every night? Cougars are where its at they dont play games
A sultry night of tacos and sex sounds nice. Should I bring home milk?
when i saw him today i think my vagina did the equivalent of a stomach growl... its been to long
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