I wish my cat could text because i would tell him that everything will be ok. and i wish he could send them back..but him have no thumbs. him no know what he would text with.
Black thong, sheer white shorts not a professional look. This chick has no idea what sunlight makes her outfit look like.
Let's review the facts-we're bored, we have a ton of beer, and we live 5 minutes from the zoo. This equation is easily solvable
I need you to help me convince Steph that she will like Tequila if she would chase it with A-1
I had to watch them play Salty Cracker. I have never seen a grown man cry with a boner before
I wonder if a fish could survive in vodka
I could
How bad would it be if I wore out the dress we got peed on in. You're the only one who knows.
I was behind him snuggling, I told him I was the big spoon and he told me I was too little it was more like he was wearing a backpack.
It's Christmas, you should know what a virgin is.
Pretty sure the guy I hooked up with Saturday gave me a buy one get one free coupon for chipotle. Who said nice guys don't exist?
I'm not over that dildo rifle story. I don't think I ever will be.
WHAT KIND OF DEALER ONLY WORKS FRI-SUN???
Ours, apparently.
She told me the only rule was that I couldn't cum on her Batman blanket.
So...#1 on my TO DO list for college is to fuck someone somewhere in the stadium during the homecoming game...you down?
Sexual side note: sushi and cum do not mix well. That is all.
Randomize
