Come home. Power Hour by yourself is only fun for the first 10 minutes.
so we were having anal, both very very drunk when he started shouting his roomates name
she has double-d's AND she knows what level Pidgeot evolves. don't tell me she's not a keeper
His penis has a special gift of curing my broken heart
I just got a msg from someone saved in my phone as "gouiys stAndingg nezxt me not oz". Omh my life.
MASS TEXT: who ever dared Todd to suck on the Clorox wipes last night.. good goin jackass. you can come visit him, hes in room 266, AFTER hes done getting his stomach pumped.
HE DARED ME TO DARE HIM... DONT PUT THAT ON ME.
i also took my stockings off in the bathroom and blew my nose with them in the cab ride home. james was appalled
I damn near set my vagina on fire. WHILE The Flaming Lips played in the background. Intensely apropos.
Just told my boss I wasn't coming in to work because of a serious case of blue balls. Totally made having them worth it.
I praised you last night for winning a chug off...you thanked me with a ridiculously hard headbutt. Thanks dick.
After owing so much in back child support they should make vasectomy a mandatory
FIND ME A DICK TO RIDE THAT HOPEFULLY IS ATTACHED TO A CUTE PERSON AND NICE PERSONALITY
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED. Is it okay if I only get 2 out of 3?
The D is nonnegotable.
Aaaaaaand, there's the title of my second book. "One Dick. Six Angles."
Well thank god i want six autographed copies
God is tempting me with everything tonight. Brownies and dick, mostly.
Looks like the opera singer hook up is paying off. Ran into the MILF from 407 and she said “your lady friend sounded like a very lucky girl.”
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