yo my bday is less then one week away. hope youve found another annoying candian i can lick dairy products off of. also sorry about your loss
I can't believe believe she called me a slut. She doesn't know anything about me or my life.
Shit, that's something a lot of sluts say.
Note left in log book: "4:30am a guy was caught masturbating in the bathroom and passed out in his own juices and we had to take the door off the hinges."
You guys are open that late?
Even DaVinci knew it was gay to draw the penis big. Thanks art history
i dont think duct tape can fix my g spot
lets call myth busters
I'm genuinely dissapointed that we didn't make any fat chicks cry
May or may not be going home with my jamitor. i'm kiddong, btw, i have no idea. i'll let you know soooon.
And then we were riding the keg in the pool like an 8 second rodeo...naked.
I'm looking forward to the release of my future best seller - "Three Words to Make Your Relationship 100% Better: Surprise Blow Jobs"
It's a gay bachelor party, it's not like dignity is to be expected
Shower sex is an art that should not be attemted drunk
Dude respond to my evite. You're either coming to the orgy or not.
So from zero to dumpster fire, how shitty do you feel this morning? I'm hovering somewhere around trainwreck.
How do you nicely stand up a date that you're skipping for a 3sum
Going back to our hometown to help Gramma move. Thinking we should see if we can fuck on the desk of the homophobic coach who first introduced us while in town.
Randomize
