i crushed up some extenze and put them in his protein powder - should make for an interesting gym experience
Seriously.......what do you have to do to get arrested in Vegas???
im using the astroglide sample u sent me as a bookmark for the book im using to write my midterm paper. i need to get laid. bad.
Call me pathetic, but saying "tits for ireland" is working out really well on chatroulette today.
What I dont get, is for a man with a penis his size, to choose to go back with another girl instead of one that he says is the best sex he's ever had. He cant afford to be picky.
You kept tellin the cashier that this order was "To Go" over and over...even tho we were in the drive-thru
They just both started mumbling "i cant go home like this" "it's all over my face" "do you have extra pants?"
yes you're required to wear a bikini its the snowpocalypse beach party
Aw c'mon. You have to see if the spinning penis rumor is true.
Just did a line with lance bass. Only in NY
Aaaand I cut your bangs with a large knife last night ...
Only you can make me eat tacos in your car, while naked, on a dead end road in a ditch on a Thursday night.
First day back to class and I have already pulled out the hard liquor
good news: i got laid. bad news: by your boyfriend
DO NOT PREHEAT THE OVEN THIS MORNING! WE STARTED USING IT AS A WINE STASH AROUND MIDNIGHT.
Randomize