Sometimes I feel like I shouldn't drink when I come out of a black out half naked covered in puke. Then I realize thats why I drink.
I know right? mind you this is the same woman who told me when I was 12 that oral sex just meant talking dirty
i'm at the st pattys day thing. the bar is packed. they just put on celine dion its all coming back to me now. i'm screaming the words.
it's 1 pm.
It involved homemade coconut rum, a waterfall, and street signs. I'll leave the rest to your capable imagination.
apparently he thought telling me 'the weasel wants to come out to play' would somehow convince me to go down on him
Currently flirting with a 57 year old. Why do i do this
Using the salt from a pretzel bag for tequila shots. Come over.
I feel like strippers are like dogs, the more you show you're terrified the faster they come at you.
I gave you a lap dance in a bowling alley... And I was Fine?
I've made a list of places I want to have sex this summer. #1: Reptile House at the zoo.
Life Lesson #1 of 2013: double-fisting shower beers and shaving my bikini line should be reserved for two different showers.
I didn't realize how trashy of a night we had.
Welllll, you did eat a cherry out of my pussy. So I think that classes it up a little.
Just come home. We will have sex and Taco Bell. I'm feeling wild, I put on temporary tattoos.
I am so disappointed that he didn't steal a Christmas tree last night.
within five minutes of being here her dog found my vibrator in my bedroom and was carrying it around all proud! and her mom is here. so embarrassing :(
Randomize
