i'm so hungover...i might vomit in a handbag instead of selling them
were with a gay guy with a minnesota accent. think about how funny that sounds.
i feel like even strangers are annoyed with me because of how drunk i was last night
I'm pretty sure I'm almost gay. Like, I'd do it if I had no choice. Like, if i were in prison I'd try it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just opened a bunch of old flavored condoms just to see what they tasted like.
note to self... there IS such a thing as having too many birthday shots...
he thinks im joking when i say don't visit. i mean it's summer...he was the college fuck and now it's time for the summer fuck
He thought the strainer was a giant bowl to puke in.
all 3 of us brought blondes home last night. all 3 are passed out. we're gonna switch rooms and see how long until one of them notices.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Lesbians are nicde people they do not take debit cards
Currently shopping online for cardboard cutouts of various horror characters. That should teach me roommates to stop taking acid on Tuesdays.
I don't understand why your family and sex lives should EVER overlap.
Actually let's just focus our energy on not getting committed to a psych ward.
Two months ago an unknown man was in my bed and now he is my boyfriend and he has 1.6 million in the bank and he buys me things because I only have $4.35 in my bank account
It could happen to you too!
I was drunk and on Craigslist.. The drunk-text offers people got must have been either horrifying or glorious
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