isnt it creepy that our bodies make people
She is making me post-sex grilled cheese at 2 am wearing only shorts and cowboy boots. I am so in love
Ok love is a little strong. But he consented to Nachos, beer and board game date with my cats. Keeper.
How do you get mayonnaise out of... well jesus it's everywhere, let's start with carpets
I fell asleep with all the lights and heat on in the apartment with windows open, Earth Hour is lost on people like me.
Getting my nails done with Diana... I'm going for the keep your friends close and the girl who's dating the guy you want to fuck closer
I got another blow job proposal last night. Skills.
Ok she stopped using her fork and knife and is legit eating that steak using her hands.
for the record im never blowing a guy on the toilet again, that was sad and degrading
I did way too many drugs this past week for having a broken nose #commitment
Last night I crashed my housemates tinderdate, smoked his weed and then left. He felt too awkward to say no.#Empowerment
Where you at? Come home and endure this shit show called "The Second Presidential Debate".
We drunkenly made out once four years ago and then he immediately vomited and honestly I've never gotten over him
I blacked out in the cab last night... Cant remember getting in the front door, also i got into bed with my grandma.
You’d probably be happy to know that I think I’ve mastered the skill of knowing “my type” and then steering clear
FINALLY. I THOUGHT THIS DAY WOULD NEVER COME!
Randomize
