If I'm having a dream where I'm having sex and I can actually feel it between my legs because I've had a lot of it recently, does that make me a whore?
I have a feeling this is a serious question. Problem solve, Jess.. I'm going to let you figure that one out on your own
PS: the photo I uploaded for this internship site is the same one i used for my fake ID. I like to keep it classy.
Just beat my spinning in office chair record. Almost puked. Totally worth it.
you woke up and yelled "the tv is moving" and fell on the floor and passed back out
He has a shower chair now. So he sits and watches me shower. It's kind of creepy.
I think I ate my cheesy fiesta potatoes cup.
Nothing like playing hide and seek with a state patrol officer early in the morning to get your heart rate up.
I feel like i just got chewed up and shit out by a ukranian midget
I'm an approx 70% certain someone switched my UV Blue for Windex - just as volatile as you might think.
So he came on my stomach this morning and I totally forgot about it until after you poured that body shot.
99% of the contents of my handbag are ketchup packets and condoms. I feel that says a lot about me as a person.
I'm to the point where I just want to get back at him in a hot man sex tornado way.
We got stoned and took selfies with the most perfect lawn
Dude why is my bed and bedding wrapped in bubble wrap?
Cuz u wanted to insure u had a safe sleep
I just want to get high and watch Dr. Pimple Popper.
Randomize
