She's a black belt cougar in the 6th degree.
he's werid. hell kiss me after i go down on him but he wont kiss me after i eat anything with mustard.
Too lazy to get out of my bed thats 2 feet away from you. Are you sure youre alright?
I tried giving you a bj last night and all you could manage was "Haha that tickles" and "in the morning"
Like some sort of pot growing robin hood.
So scratching an ex marines beard, telling him "nice hairy pussy." then when he opens his mouth to respond, I started fingering his mouth. Needless to say was a horrible idea
The Medal of Honor you banged could be at the inauguration today. You really dropped the ball on keeping up with that one.
I'm not the one who gave a guy that lives next door to my grandmother a blowjob in a pub bathroom in Ireland, you have no room to judge.
I just gate-crahed a party and met a state senator, so I had an interesting afternoon jog.
I just want it to be said that I had sex in my Belle dress last night. Classy motherfucker.
I'm going to sleep with this bank teller and I'm going to enjoy it, just try and stop me
Fun fact: the guy I banged last night. His middle name on his birth certificate is "Windstorm."
You think that was bad? One time my parents found my sister half naked on top of the four runner in the garage. She makes me look like the good child.
I really prefer to do my walks of shame in the summer
Just saw a girl I banged wearing a pro life shirt downtown. Not sure where to start with that.
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